29 December 2019

Reflecting on 2019

It wouldn't be the end of the year if I didn't reappear and reflect on the year that's gone by. I've largely been missing in action from this blog- sometimes with good reason and sometimes not.

I'm currently sitting on my grandma's couch and got the spark to type. I'm going to try my best to keep this as natural as possible. I can tell this post is going to trail on, but I'm going to let it.

In a professional capacity I don't think this year could have gone any better. I have had incredible opportunities, like working at national newspapers, getting my first full-time job at a property company over the summer and becoming editor of my university's student newspaper. I've enjoyed every second of it all.

However, in a personal capacity, I'm declaring 2019 to have been a bit of a 'meh' year. Sure, I gained and lost friends but I can't say that it was particularly exciting, which possibly explains the lack of blog posts. There was no great drama, no soul-igniting love story or tales. It was just average.

I've been struggling to come up with goals for the New Year too. In 2019, I hoped I'd get published in a national newspaper, which was a success. I guess in broad terms, I'm hoping that the trajectory of my professional life continues the way it's going. I may close 2020 with a masters degree, I may not. I can't wait to find out.

In terms of my personal life, it'd be great if that went onwards and mostly upwards. I did end up on the medication accutane for nine months of this year which taught me that sometimes life truly is a marathon and not a sprint. I'm left with scars on my cheeks, but otherwise completely levelled skin. I do still get the odd pimple now and again which is discouraging considering I've only just finished my medication, but when I look back on old photos I'm reminded of just how far I've come.

There are some habits that I'm hoping to leave firmly in this decade, like managing my time online, avoiding endless scrolling on social media and complaining less.

On the last day of 2018, I wrote: "So, to future Steph, to the version of me that will return to this post with a few days left of 2019, I just wanted to say that I have no idea what kind of year you have had. I have no doubts that there were lots of little moments that you don't remember now but I also hope there were lots of BIG moments- blissful big moments that you playback and smile when thinking about. I hope you're reading this and you're smiling at how much things have improved from where you were one year ago. 2018 Steph can't wait to see what the year has in store for you but you'll just have to write up a post and let us all know."

Well, 2019 Steph...what's the verdict?

Things were never bad in 2018, but they definitely got better in 2019. I'm admiring my hopefulness and excitement at the future. I know I've made the 2018 version of me proud. There were lots of blissful 'big' moments, and dozens more of those smaller but crucial moments.

As I did last year, I'll do it again:

Dear 2020 Steph,

I'm currently on yiayia's couch and I know where you are. Well, I don't know where you are but I know what you're doing. You're currently writing your review of 2020 and you're wondering what you wrote last year. I hope you're not impressed with what you're reading. It's lacked specifics and waffled on, but don't be angry at yourself, it's all you could manage.

I hope your year has surprised you. I hope you've met people who have shown you how to love, how to be kinder and to be a better person. I wonder if you've done a masters or gone straight into work. If you are currently studying, I'd love to know where and what.

I hope you've continued making quirky videos and sharing the moments that people don't often see online. I also hope that your acne hasn't come back. I'm also curious as to how many blog posts you'll end up typing over the year.

Most importantly though Steph, I hope you're fulfilled and living with purpose. I hope you're surrounded by friends who mean the world to you and have had new experiences. I hope you're good.

To my readers, this hasn't been the most eloquent and riveting post, but it's my little check up with Social Spying and you.

How's your 2019 been? Have you set yourself any goals for the upcoming year? Are there any habits that you're leaving firmly in 2019?

Till next time-
Steph
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