21 October 2019

You'll Never Believe Why I Delete Social Media Apps from My Phone (It's not what you think)

Here's a fun fact about me: I don't keep any social media apps on my phone. Now, I know what you're  probably thinking "She wants to get off social media". You're not wrong, but you're also not 100 per cent right.

You see, as much as I'm against social media, I'm not against the ease of direct messages, so you'd think at the minimum Facebook's Messenger would be safe from my daily deleting spree. Again, you'd be wrong.

Most mornings, and throughout the day, I log into Instagram via the web which lets me see most things--including whether I have any DMs. I log into Facebook the same way (yes, I still use the platform), however, If I have a message, all I see is a red notification. From my mobile, I can't actually see the message without getting Messenger or logging into my laptop which is sometimes frustrating.

Now, I know what you're thinking: "Steph, where the gobbity goop are you going with this?" Well, the thing is one night in my first year of university, after meeting a friend for an early dinner, I woke up to the tone of my phone ringing from that same friend who I'd shared nachos with at the riverside earlier that evening. I remember bouncing out of bed discombobulated and thinking how odd it was that my friend was calling me. It was only around 11pm, but he was all too aware that I liked to be in bed well before then, so I found it odd that he'd call.

By the time I'd leapt from my bed to it's charging spot at the table across the room, it'd stopped ringing.I figured that it must have been urgent and called him straight back. This was also around the time that I'd leave my ringtone on 'loud' as I slept because of a 'always available' policy I'd encourage my friends to use.

When he picked up he seemed as confused as I was. He told me he hadn't called and that I must have been dreaming about him, much to his ego's delight. But I was dumbfounded, at a loss of words. I was so certain that he'd called. He then asked me to send him a screenshot of the missed call--and it wasn't there. There was no proof of the tone that had shaken me out of my slumber. Had I really dreamed it?

If so, it remains to be the most hyper-realistic dream I've had. I still haven't forgotten the vividness of it-- and a large part of me still likes to think it wasn't a dream, but I guess we'll never confirm for certain.

"When he picked up he seemed as confused as I was. He told me he hadn't called and that I must have been dreaming about him, much to his ego's delight."

Although I wouldn't mind keeping Messenger and all it's friends on my phone, even if it's at the risk of my sleep, I choose to delete the apps daily because I'm so afraid that, if indeed it was a dream, I'd opt to text someone who I haven't spoken to in years. If I imagined a call, what would stop me from imagining a text? That would be nightmare.

My policy of being reachable 24/7 is long gone. I don't encourage people to mess with my sleep anymore, that's a service I offer to close friends and family exclusively, but since then my social media policy has changed too. Yes, it's highly annoying but I cannot risk having it any other way.

Till next time,
Steph

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1 comment

  1. Hi Steph,
    I think this is an interesting post! Something similar happened to me when I blocked someone from my Instagram and they ended up liking my recent, tripping me up and thinking "Did I really block this guy?". I feel like it's caused from over-communication or being online constantly that you get used to the vibrating notifications of someone calling or texting. I sometimes get the feeling someone buzzed my phone with a text every once in a while.

    I understand your point-of-view though, it can cause a lot of anxiety. So I try to focus on myself and my goals than my online presence. I've been meaning try a social media cleanse, so thank you for the post :)

    - nicole | www.wallflowerings.com

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